And Start the Divorce Announcements ... NOW!

Remember yesterday I was having a moment about everyone getting engaged/married? Sadly, the divorce notices are already happening ... yeesh!

Why Some Classics Should Remain Classics

Did anyone grow up with the "Dick and Jane" children's book series? I guess they're considered classics. I suppose this should be a lesson that proves that some old classics should just remain classics and not be used for children of the new millennium. Some things just don't translate the same way 50 years later.

Everyone's Engaged!!!!!

Thanks to Facebook, I happen to know that everyone and their mother is getting engaged/married. Do I feel left out? Yes, but for all the wrong reasons! It's driving me a little crazy. (Note: This annoyance is towards all couples that I really don't give a rat's ass about, like acquaintances from high school.) But on the plus side, I get to see really cool engagement pictures (and also painfully cheesy engagement pictures which make me cringe in my seat):

Guess I know who to ask if I want a good photographer. Haha!

That's pretty much it for now. Nothing exciting is going on with me right now. Just auditioning and getting little gigs here and there. Don't get me wrong, those little things definitely signify progress, but they're hardly worth mentioning here. I might have a job interview soon though! Send good thoughts my way!!!

Odd How the Mind Works

The crazy thing about an eating disorder is that it's pretty much a psychological disorder - it's all in the head. I'm fine now. Thank goodness I bought a pair of leggings because I put them on and noticed that I didn't have a "muffin top" with them on. That's how I realized that my body is actually still the same. It's amazing how I took my eyes off the mirror in that moment, then looked back and I suddenly was no longer "fat". 

I'm okay ... for now. 

Being Uncomfortable

I'm physically and mentally uncomfortable. I think being back in Los Angeles has definitely been a positive decision because I'm close to my parents and Noel. So I have people to see and talk to regularly. But at the same time, I just don't feel like I've found any respite from life.

I have started myself on birth control again, being that I'm now in the dating world and I have no idea what situation I might find myself in. So I thought I'd take this precaution because I really have no interest in having a baby at the moment. But at the same time I think my body is reacting to it. I'm definitely a bit more bloated than usual, which is triggering off my eating disorder and sending me into a panic about weight gain. I currently am not signed up with a gym because I don't have the money. So without that, the psychological part of my anorexia is not evening out. I'd go for a run but I'm feeling so exhausted, which is just a symptom of menstruation, period (no pun intended). 

On top of that, I am bored out of my mind. I know that the economy is bad so it's not a huge surprise that I haven't landed a job yet. I'm actively sending out resumes and I started auditioning again last week. Essentially I just have a lot of free time on my hands, which means that my mind is running rampant. It is my worst enemy right now and I'm driving myself insane.

I kinda wish I had a dog right now. The animal would at least give me something to do. 

I don't know if it's just me, but I really don't like watching TV these days. Maybe it's me coming off of 3 years of not physically owning a TV, but I really don't have much patience to sit in front of it. I find I'd rather be on the internet looking for pointless dribble.

Sometimes I wish there was something like Adderall for the brain or something. I'm going nuts! Although I will say, I'd probably be in a worse frame of mind if I were in NYC by myself.